Earth is crammed with heaven

We had a celebration dinner last night. As we raised a glass of our chosen beverage, we congratulated ourselves on surviving 14 days without killing each other. We then tucked into an amazing toad-in-the-hole. I shared the family recipe with Ryan. He's a science teacher so I was as scientific as I could be... Beat the eggs. (We used 4). Add plain flour until the mixture becomes lumpy. Add cold water slowly and gradually until it becomes a liquid again. Da-da! That combined with sausages cut in half, and partly cooked; and very hot oil; made the best toad-in-the-hole ever. Mash, veg and gravy completed a celebratory meal that would be the stuff of legend in years to come. And before I forget, regular readers will remember yesterday's connundrum. Compassion in the time of Corona. The answer is... (cue drum-roll) I'm not telling you as only one lovely friend played along. She was right, by the way, but now you'll never know. So there! Joel returned

We're almost there! Tomorrow marks the end of our self-isolation. In some ways, nothing much will change. We'll still be following government advice, and staying home as much as we can. Chris isn't well enough for a start. However we are all key-workers except Nathan, so some things will be different. I didn't sleep very well last night. We had news yesterday that two of our church are in hospital. One confirmed with the virus, and one awaiting results. It's like this shizzle has just got real. That, coupled with the fact that I will need to be out and about in the community from tomorrow, means that I felt quite anxious overnight. I'd planned to take today off anyway. I didn't manage it completely as there are always calls to make, but I will be keeping an eye on things. I need to play the long game. We had a bit of a dilemma in Testosterone Towers this morning, the title of which is Compassion in the time of Corona...? Are you ready?

Those of you that attend our church will know we often have a 'hands-up' at some point during our services. So here's one for today. Hands up if you're wondering if you've washed your hands enough today? Hands up if you've commented on the weather at least three times? Hands up if you secretly enjoyed being able to go to church in your pyjamas? I woke fairly early this morning after a night of very vivid dreams. I dream a lot anyway, and over the last few weeks they seem to be increasing in their weirdness. Last night's involved pacifying a hairdresser, waiting for a table in an empty restaurant, and being late for the theatre. I suspect my brain has a lot to process overnight. Today has been quite relaxed. I'm trying to make a note of the things I have done when the day seems to go well. One of the things that definitely helps is being outside in one form or another.. We dodged the snow-showers this morning, and thanks to technology w

Saturday is usually fairly routine around here. I get up first to meet Team Pants for a swim in the local lake. Joel is usually working. Chris and Nathan are often at the West Ham game. Ryan and Megan are usually here or at her house, And Saturday night is Take Away night. There are usually some things to be finalised for Sunday worship too. I missed my swim desperately today. It’s been almost two weeks since my last one, and for me it’s benefits are threefold: 1. A laugh with friends. 2. The exercise 3.  Improved mental health. I’m a teeny bit concerned about the long-term effects if this goes on for a long time. I’m sure everyone has something they feel the same about. I haven’t yet resorted to a cold bath or the paddling pool in the garden, but there’s time yet. Yesterday the boys were working out in the garden. We don’t have gym equipment at home so they had to improvise with garden chairs, bags of firewood, the hose on it’s reel, a punctured football and

I had an early start today. I've noticed over the last few days that I have times when I feel OK, and times when I feel distinctly unwell. I read somewhere that we are in a state of shock at the moment, and shock is exhausting. So I'm working when I feel able, and resting when I need to. Work has been done entirely from home throughout this time. Today I felt the need for a face-to-face with our Centre Co-ordinator. When I say face-to-face; We were in the car park at the hall. I signed her Key-Worker letter with lots of hand-gel, sleeves and distance between us. We chatted, laughed a bit, and prayed. It was so good to do that. We don't always have time under normal circumstances. The rest of the day has been sat in the garden. I was armed with phone in one hand, and Visitor's Book (Addresses and Phone numbers) in the other. For context, part of my role is giving pastoral care. Over the last few years, due to illness, I've been able to do less a

It’s early afternoon in Testosterone Towers. I’ve felt a bit out of sorts for the last 24hrs, so I haven’t ventured further than the distance between the bathroom and my bed. The main issue seems to be aching limbs, fatigue, and a headache that comes and goes. I’ve watched an episode of The Crown but struggled to keep my eyes open. I remembered that Audible have released some free books. The ones I have, took a bit too much concentration. Although the free titles are for children, there are also some classics. Those that know me well, will not be surprised to learn I’ve been drifting in and out of sleep, listening to Winnie the Pooh volume 1. It’s familiarity is oddly comforting. Life in Testosterone Towers is continuing much as expected. Chris took Daisy out this morning. It was his first solo-walk since before this began. It was wonderful to see all the good wishes in response to his photo yesterday. In the absence of testing, we’re as sure as we can be that

Good afternoon and Happy Pancake Day! It was a welcome distraction to do something a little different today. The pancakes were hailed as the best they’d ever tasted. Considering I used out-of-date ingredients, I was very happy. Testosterone Towers seems to be working out it’s own rhythm. We all view routine differently, so it’s been important to let it evolve. We’ve carried on with a film every evening after dinner. We usually video-call my Mum at that time too. It seems to work well, and our Harry Potter Marathon is almost complete. One thing I struggle with sometimes is the boy/man banter. They all think they are really funny... To be fair they are quite amusing, if a little disruptive in important family planning meetings. I haven’t used my ‘death-stare’ much, but I’m well practiced at it. It’s good to have Chris well enough to be part of things again. It’s been horrible but he makes a little progress every day. Finally We had a little incident yesterday invo

The sun rose bright and early over Testosterone Towers this morning. We have been in self-isolation for a week now so we celebrated with a family planning meeting. (You know, by now...) We fine-tuned a few things. During the announcements we said how nice it was to have Chris in the meeting. (Cue round of applause) He thanked everyone for their prayers and good wishes. Then we all had a drink and something to eat. It was all quite familiar really. Chris and I ventured out to walk Daisy. Chris’s first time outside in over a week. He’s had a couple of coughing fits today. It was a little worrying when we are looking out for breathing difficulties, but he was ok. The main one was self-induced as he was being silly in the meeting. Work for me has been mainly pastoral, and most of it by phone. We were due to be doing a funeral today. We had every confidence in the people who stood in for us, and it was lovely to phone and tell them that, and pray with them before th

There seems to be a different vibe around these parts today. Admittedly I haven’t been downstairs yet. But from the perspective of my bed it seems to have altered. You may have guessed by my location that I’m not feeling great today. Over the last few days I’ve had waves of feeling great, and waves of feeling quite poorly. I’ve increased my asthma inhalers as a precaution,  but I can’t help wondering if my immune system  has ramped up a gear since I’ve been cold-water swimming. Maybe this is the virus but I only have mild symptoms. We shall see. Testosterone Towers is a hive of activity today. One taking conference calls, One chatting to his girlfriend, One recovering, with new achievements every day, And one who today, has joined the multitude who are not sure whether  they will be paid as they are on a zero hour contract. It’s interesting that 4/5 of us are classed as Key-Workers. Once this period of isolation is over we will be out there wi

Happy Sunday! This is just a short one to say I hope today has been ok for you. It's been a much better day in Testosterone Towers. I woke up to blue skies and sunshine, a cup of Earl Grey and a fist-bump from my eldest son. It's been a strange Mothers Day. I wasn't working for a start. But amid the weirdness, I realised how lucky I am to be with my family. If you've been alone I hope it's been ok. Highlights were 1. The brilliant film, "What we did on our holiday" If you haven't seen it, it's on Amazon Prime. It's funny, silly, poignant and uplifting. We really enjoyed it. 2. A roast dinner cooked for me. 3. Hearing about what others have been up to in isolation. I've enjoyed people being creative and innovative, especially about church. I'm really proud of what our own church has done today. I am horrified though, at the way people are ignoring government advice on self-distancing, and treating today lik

Today has been hard, but largely uneventful in Testosterone Towers. Everyone is struggling and getting on each others nerves. Chris is definitely getting stronger, but his bursts of energy are very short-lived. It's a relief that he's improving, but I think recovery could be a long road. I need to say how great the people at Harlow Salvation Army are. Teamwork definitely makes the dream work. Ryan has a new BFF as of lunchtime today. My friend managed to source him some Anti-Bacterial spray. Had we mentioned he also goes by the name of Cinders? We have a few more coughs in the household today. There's a sense of inevitability about it, but it reminds me a bit of being pregnant and waiting to go into labour. The uncertainty of whether it's a cold, COVID19, or we're just tired and washed out from the situation we're in. So that's it really. The last half-hour brought a delivery of KFC. This was accompanied by some uplifting music as we d

I've had a good day today! Regular readers will know I've been struggling with overwhelm in the mornings. Today was different because.... I ignored my phone for a while. It worked like magic! I believe Chris is feeling a little better today. I know this because he spent half an hour this morning chatting, checking things were organised, and generally making a nuisance of himself. Chris and I have worked full-time all our lives, even when the children came along. So there is an "all hands on deck" vibe in our house. We are all used to doing what needs done as required. This seems to be invaluable at the moment. Jobs get allocated every day to try and share the load. I think this has contributed to Chris's feelings of helplessness. When we're used to playing our part, it's hard when you can't. Also, the key to recovery from the virus is rest, which is definitely a skill to be learned. There's also the reality that most of us w

Well that escalated quickly! If you missed the update, here's the link https://karensandford.blogspot.com/2020/03/day-2-update.html After last night's shenanigans, we got a few hours sleep. Today has been a sobering one in many ways. Understandably we are all a bit flat. Partly because of lack of sleep. Partly because the news came out about not sitting exams. It's the strangest thing. It's hard to see teenagers so upset about their school life coming to an end so abruptly. It affects our family too. Work was quite consuming today. Lots of questions, conversations, decisions to make. I'm grateful for a team who are pro-active, offer a listening ear, remind me that I need to take care, and deliver goodies. I called it a day mid-afternoon and celebrated with a nap. Like most people, we don't have the luxury of a big house, so we still breathe each other's air, we don't have a spare bed, so we still share. Ryan was chef tonight

Morning! Before you read the rest of this, Chris is tucked up in bed. He’s ok and we’re ok! However he collapsed just before 2am. Thankfully I was awake. An ambulance came and confirmed his symptoms and by the time it arrived all obs were normal and he was talking again. We were concerned at taking up time, but they said he was the only one they’d seen so far in their shift that had symptoms. There’s a lot of panic around. One positive thing is we’re almost certain now that he has it, so once he’s better he will be immune hopefully. Keep washing! Lots of love x

We’d decided to let everyone sleep this morning. General guidelines are that you should establish a routine but that can wait. I had a real sense of overwhelm this morning. Everything seemed so alien at home, I had no interest in making decisions for anyone else. Recent years have taught me to accept how I feel for the moment, so I made tea for us, went back to bed, and looked at Twitter on my phone. Big mistake. Huge. The overwhelm train had left the station, and was well on the way to despair. After a few minutes I decided to get up, shower and dress. I sent a text to my DL saying that today I was concentrating on getting organised at home, and I’d think about work tomorrow. I then convened a family planning meeting at 1pm. (Still not that sort...) Attendance was compulsory. Snacks would be provided. It was interesting ... We agreed lots of things: Binge-watching was allowed but not in the main living room. Communal TV was to be agreed by the majority.

Day 1 - 17.3.20 Chris has been coughing for a few days but today was different somehow. We decided he should stay home. I went to the church to try and make plans with our Centre-Coordinator while we awaited guidelines from an emergency meeting at THQ. The problem we face is that traditionally we have always been the church that helps. We are the ones who go into difficult situations. We roll up our sleeves. We feel the fear but do it anyway. But this is a potentially lethal disease. Some people have tested positive with no symptoms. It has a long incubation period. It’s not just our lives we’re risking, but the lives of others in our care. The group decision to cancel activities this week while we await guidance was largely supported, with  just a few suggesting we were over-reacting. Within a few hours our family was in self-isolation. The two who were out at work and school had to return home. I was trying to make decisions for the church, with our team, and f