Earth is crammed with heaven

It's been a while. I'm sorry Words have failed me a lot over these past weeks. Regular readers of the blog may remember my well-documented search for joy during most Advents. But this year it's Lent that has passed me by, virtually unnoticed. Lost in the where's And why's. The what The when The who Of life in my world. The truth is this: The events of the past 5 weeks or so have stripped me almost bare. I could feel the resilience I'd worked so hard for being chipped away piece by piece. And now at the start of this holiest of weeks I'm on my knees Pleading for something Anything That will lift me from the place I've fallen. A place of greyness Where anxiety threatens And hope trembles And only love penetrates. 'The ground is level at the foot of the cross And that's where we find ourselves as Holy Week begins.... There is room here for each of us And grace enough for all of us And not one of us stand beyond Hi...

This past fortnight has been a tough one. In the aftermath, these are my thoughts: I believe that God, Father God, Loves me supremely, Irrevocably Unbelievably, Immeasurably. He understands us when humans misunderstand. He values us when we are un-valued. He represents us when we are misrepresented. I believe God speaks through the Bible. Through other people Through my heart and my mind. I believe that God can And often does Redeem everything. But that doesn't mean we should settle for less than the best. I believe that humans make mistakes. When we do, We should admit it, Say sorry And move on. I believe that God works in our lives over periods of time. He prepares us for what lies ahead. He gives us courage. He whispers words of love, And hope, Through the storm. I believe that God fights for us, as people, as individuals, as a family, and not just for our situations. I believe that wounds from friendly fire Cut deeper than those of ene...

Lord, I am open. Open to what you want to do in my life. Open to love Life Joy Peace Open to all you have for me Even though the path may be different to the one I imagined, Or even hoped for. Your love is deep Wide High Strong Unending My faith in you has not faltered. You know the plans you have for me. I am open. 'For I know the plans I have for you, Plans to prosper you, not to harm you, Plans to bring about the future you hoped for.' Jeremiah 29:11

I was on retreat for a few days last week. It was with the Salvation Army officers from our region. Wednesday morning dawned bright and clear. We were sent off with a copy of Psalm 23 clutched tightly in our hands to meditate on and learn during 60 minutes of silence. I set off with my camera in hand. I'd done something similar recently, So already knew the psalm by heart. As I walked I recited and clicked. The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. And so on And so forth And it was easy to recite And live As I walked beside the still waters. I heard God speak several times And then I arrived here. And our conversation went like this: God: Well go on then. (I knew what was coming bit couldn't quite believe He was going to say it.) Me: What? G: Lie down in green pastures. Me: You're joking right? It's cold. Damp. Frosty. Muddy. And I'm wearing a skirt. And a new cardigan. G: ...

He called me daughter. With a smile on his face. A twinkle in his eye. His arms outstretched. I  ran and jumped into his arms. And he swung me high. Held me close. And we laughed. How we laughed. Deep belly-chuckles. Giggles so high they robbed us of breath. My girl. You're my girl. Always. 'Daughter, your faith has given you life. Go in peace' Luke 8:48

He wept And His heart? It broke in two. With every cry Of fear Anguish Pain Grief Loss Disbelief And it breaks Over And Over For all eternity. And His name? His name shall be called Emmanuel. Emmanuel. God With Us. And  them.

This is the first Christmas for several years that I haven't set out in search of Christmas joy. You know that lament 'I don't feel Christmassy.' So we grit our teeth, and try our best to make the feelings come. This year is different somehow. Maybe because time does heal At least partly. But I think it's because I'm learning to live in the moment. The practice of mindfulness has helped. And in that moment it's ok. It's ok to feel happy Or sad Or tired Or grumpy Or full of beans Or overjoyed Or overwhelmed Or.... It's ok. Truly. Stop Breathe Remember. He is Immanuel God with us. Right here Right now. God with us may not change our circumstances Our disappointments or frustrations But He shares it Feels it Lives it. Immanuel The wonder of Christmas That God left the splendour of his world To get messy in ours. He knows He feels He loves Oh how He loves. Immanuel