Earth is crammed with heaven

It's taken me a while to get to a point where I could write this post. Last year I wrote here http://karensandford.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/in-search-of-joy.html about being in search of joy. But this year was bound to be different. The darkness of last year's Advent was no more. It wasn't the first Christmas without our loved ones. The boys are happy. I'm enjoying my new church and ministry. Chris is fulfilled in his new role. Christmas joy would be all around, right? Well actually... The truth is that it's been harder to find joy this December than last. And I write not to gain your sympathy But because I'm reminded how difficult this time of year is for so many. The race to feel "Christmassy" is well and truly on. What will help us in our quest for that Holy Grail? Carols Parties Carol Services Christmas plays Cards Presents Winter Wonderland? Well none of them worked for me. And in my prayers last week I felt God say, ...

I had to bite my tongue today. Hard. I was in the hairdressers And the lady next to me, And her stylist, Spent about half an hour Talking about men. Apparently the secret of her long marriage is pretending. She pretends she needs her husband to do things. She pretends she's not strong enough. If she wants something to happen she plants the seeds And pretends he's really clever to think of such a thing. Half an hour earlier I overheard a group of women congratulating a poor, helpless workman On his ability to multi-task. Really? Come on girls we can do better than that! Now I know they're not perfect by a long stretch But then neither are we. Most men I know are decent human beings. They love well. They think for themselves. They work hard to help provide for people who depend on them. They may not always be able to multi-task, but sometimes I wish I didn't. I'm not trivializing the reality for many women throughout the world who are b...

I went for an Advent Quiet Day today. For guidance we were given the four songs of Advent. Zechariah Mary The Angels Elizabeth They all sang praises to God. Songs of assurance Of faith Of hope Of trust. But there was something else that I noticed today. In every case Fear preceded the song. Fear preceded the blessing. In every case they were told, "Don't be afraid". One of my hang overs from my illness and loss is fear. I can still do ministry. I can still lead worship. I can still go into new situations. But fear grips me. I feel anxious And tearful And afraid. But God reminded me today That feeling afraid is part of what makes us human. It brings the 'fight or flight' response in us. It's ok to feel afraid. I don't need to be ashamed of it. But fear needn't cripple me. God has already fought the fight for me. When I am weak He is strong.

Well you've done it again. And every time it takes me by surprise. And how quickly I forget Until I come into your presence with intent And you meet me And love me And strengthen me And bless me beyond my imaginings Again and again. As I list your gifts... The little things in my life... My spirit leaps within me. And something Joy? Bubbles up from within. And you're here And you're now And you love How you love... Gratitude turns my heart to you. And mechanical lists of the mundane Become prayers of thanks. And I'm surprised Over and over by the same thing. That you're here That you're now And you love How you love. And you meet me And love me And strengthen me And bless me beyond my imaginings Again and again.

I had a free day to myself yesterday. I promised myself I could do whatever I wanted. The only rule was I had to do it alone. Now I love people. I love sharing chat And laughs And coffee And food And more chat. But yesterday was to be different. Yesterday was my day for alone-time with Jesus. A whole day without interruptions Doing whatever I liked But with Jesus. When the rain cleared And I saw the azure sky And the brilliant sunshine I decided to start up Reigate Hill. I knew there were trees And wide open spaces And spectacular views And there was Jesus. We shared a lot, He and I. There was intense prayer And tears And an overwhelming sense of being loved. He reminded me that he is Healer. And he took me to a place where 6 months previously I had known deep, deep distress. He reminded me that in that distress I gained courage And self-worth And confidence And his plan for my future was realised just a few days later. And he told me ...

I love the word Grace. If I'd had a little girl I wanted to call her Charis, which is grace in Greek. But I didn't have a girl. And Charis Sandford has too many s's. But I digress. I would love to be graceful. To glide when I walk instead of clomp. To have that aura of serenity that people have. Especially tall people Who are also slim And have long legs I hate them already! And there lies the rub. I do suffer a bit from the green eyed monster. I realised last week that I'm great at weeping with those who weep. But rejoicing with those who rejoice I struggle with sometimes Especially if they seem to live a charmed life. And are tall And slim With long legs And are graceful... You see?? The phrase "full of grace and truth" has been on my mind today. I thought it described Mary,  but it describes Jesus coming into the world. The Word became flesh And dwelt among us  Full of grace and truth. Oh to be like Him! Full of grace and truth.

It's Friday. That day where we write for the pure joy of writing. Then we link up here http://lisajobaker.com/category/five-minute-friday/ Why not join in? Today's prompt is TOGETHER "We're all in this together One sweet note that we are, we're all stars..." I can still do the dance routine. The one we learnt as a team Ready to share with the children coming to camp. There's a togetherness that comes from sharing that kind of experience. When sleep is scarce But laughs are abundant And God-moments come from all kinds of places. And this week I remembered another kind of togetherness. The links between fellow-travellers The connectedness The encouragement The sharing The prayers The tears that spring to eyes as I remembered We truly are all in this together We Jesus-followers We Salvationists We officers who form "the leadership team of The Salvation Army." We know... The joys The sorrows The pain The blessings Th...