Yes you read the title right.
I haven't eaten chocolate since before the beginning of Lent.
I'm as surprised as you.
Especially as it was the very thing I swore I wouldn't do,
the whole 'giving up' thing.
I commenced my physical, emotional and spiritual de-cluttering on Ash Wednesday.
And as the days passed and things were cleared away,
I began to realise I hadn't eaten chocolate.
Or drank diet coke/pepsi.
And what was more surprising was,
I didn't really miss them.
Not at first anyway.
As I was clearing away the stuff that crowds in on my life,
it was putting the things I relied on in plain sight.
When things go wrong,
when difficulties arise,
when life got tough
I'd reach for the cans and the Cadbury's.
Now don't misunderstand me;
I know there are much worse things I could be reaching for.
But as I attempt to lead a life in full reliance on God,
I became aware that I needed to make God my chocolate,
Prayer my diet coke,
And listening for his voice my comfort food.
And there you have it.
As I knelt at the cross on Wednesday night of Holy Week
the words going through my mind were
'Nothing but thy blood can save me.'
It's the blood of Jesus that saves me,
and makes me new.
And as a daughter of the resurrection
I want to live free.
Free from all that holds me back.
(Now where's that chocolate...?)